In Silence...

Names have power. You can call those names again and again, and no one answers. The key is, it's not just the names, it's the passion behind them. The vibrations are different, and that is where the power is. Many things have been misunderstood through the ages, castrated in some cases. Turned into meaningless rituals, all passion carefully and completely removed.

It seems at times that the vibrations are stronger in the darkness. Maybe it is just a trick of the mind, perhaps it’s the absence of those burning rays from the sun. You call the names into the pitch blackness, powerful, and sometimes the black becomes liquid. To touch it, to feel that new substance is unique, yet comforting... At least to some of us. It can be a door, but beyond that door, there is no simple way back, not as you are.

It can be that demons torment us in our sleep. No, they torment us in our dreams. There is a difference. They chase us down dark hallways, through ever narrowing passages, and we think we manage to escape. We are the intruders though, not they. We are the ones reaching out our minds, they are not coming to us. What is it that we really fear in them?

I sat once, at the shore of a dark lake, full moon above, reflecting the cool perfect surface. I could hear them sing, faintly, off in the vast distance. I lost part of myself, crashing down to the rocks I sat upon. I watched omni-dimensional beings poke through the surface, begging me to feel, and lose a bit more...

Led into a cave, where the music was loud. So loud. They sang in such mesmerizing beauty, such perfection, and such sounds, like nothing one can really hear. They resonate with your soul. Reminding you of something long lost, long forgotten.

There is a tipping point. Between here and there. A tightrope to be walked. You can call the names, and bring it closer to you. You can risk it all, and move closer to them. Risky, though, as the demons are always lurking. Any doorway will do.

The moon can shake the sky, and balls of fire drip down like rain. Images in the sky are never what they seem, they are always hiding another dimension, another reality to themselves. There is a magnificent view from the tightrope. Startling. Ineffable. Our minds are limited, more so than we know. There in lies the pleasure of it all, the expansion, the limitless creativity and exploration. So often one in the same. From that tightrope, up so high, there also lie the trappings of madness. You have to be mad, to walk across at all. The fall, drops you to the furthest reaches of the abyss.

So call the names all you want. It is stale and hollow without the spirit of the thing. Without the fire and passion. Without the understanding. A dragon’s breath, however, opens doors, and a trek through the underworld is good for the soul. Torn to shreds, assailed from all sides, and worn through. Ripped away and left, dead and dying… as it should be. Learn the gates, learn the names, and learn the proper meaning of sacrifice. Else, say nothing. In silence. Remain.

Book Review: Graham Hancock "Supernatural"

Graham Hancock never ceases to impress me. That is not an easy task, and Supernatural, again, does the trick. I wasn't sure what I was getting into with this book, I had read very little about it, but knew that it had little to do with his previous works. One of the things that I admire about Graham is that he approaches things so open, with respect and wisdom. A sense of wonder is always present. He never gets so caught up on a theory that he starts losing his balance, he is very aware that he may change his mind further on down the road as more information comes to light. This is what is lacking in so much paranormal and fringe work. This piece starts off a bit slow, working its way through the various cave art around Africa and Europe, and discussing the various theories on what they mean. Where he goes from there is fantastic. I have always held that there are strong connections between the fairy faiths, UFO’s, angels and demons, etc., as well as occult experiences. However, I had never thought to add into that Shamanic and trance experiences. Graham manages to strip back yet more of the disguise, and show the connections between them all (not so much on the occult side of things, though). It expands on the ideas of researchers like Jacques Vallee, and manages to tie in even more of the puzzle. At no point does he, however, present you with a set theory or idea. He is not someone to push things, and that continues here. Graham explores the various ideas and research conducted on altered states of consciousness, and pokes around in some DNA theories, and tries to show, more than anything, the connections, and possible correlations between what seem like widely separated subjects. Also, not one to sit by and use other people’s work as a substitute for direct experience, he travels to see said cave paintings, just as he dove on undersea ruins, and traveled to lost cities for past books. He also experiments with various mind altering drugs, in order to really understand what he is writing about. His experiences and conclusions make it all the more valuable. Once again, he antagonizes the dogmatic, however unintentional, in an honest and open exploration of ideas. It’s something that science as a whole could benefit from. You don’t have to agree with anything he concludes here, or anywhere else, but he pursues his course with honesty and integrity. He is open minded and logical. He doesn’t shun science, but isn’t afraid to speculate, either. Well worth the hefty read. You may walk away with a new way of looking at the world...

Ancient Children

Age is such a strange thing in our society. It really is meaningless. I truly wonder if we were all unaware of our ‘age’, how it would affect us. Would two people the same physical age, be very different? Would one 70 year old be bent and decrepit and another still be somewhat youthful and energetic, simply because they didn’t have that definer to force them into a behavior? I mean, even with our age obsessed culture, you see people like William Shatner or Terry Funk doing things that people half their age can’t do, while other people hit 40 or 50 and look like they’re dead. What if we didn’t know? We all go through the opening for our lives, childhood, where we learn how to function and interact. Some of us do it better or quicker than others. And there is a point, where the body fails to reproduce the cells needed to survive any longer and we die of old age. But the mind is the power behind it, and a strong mind, creates a strong life and body. Some people seem to WANT to be old, so they can… I don’t know. They hit like 26 and start complaining that they can’t do things like they used to. In what sane world is 26 old and feeble? Seriously, at 26 you have only just begun your adult life, if you are having problems functioning, you are probably doing something wrong.

Then there are age limits. If you are 16 you can drive a car. You know, there are some 13 and 14 year old’s that I have met that could probably drive a car responsibly. On the other hand, there are people 40+ that should not be allowed near the driver’s side of a car. It’s ok though, cause they are old enough to drive. There shouldn’t just be a driver’s test, but a competency test, and maybe one that has to be repeated here and there just to make sure, because I am pretty sure that behind the wheel of a car is where some of the most stupendously stupid decisions are made. Age is not a factor. Age does not make you a good driver. How long you’ve been driving does not either. Yet, here is another example of how age obsessed our culture is.

I think what really ages us, is not years, but what we do with them. I look around, and I see the people who are ‘old’, regardless of their physical age, are the people who stopped learning. Stopped creating. Just stopped. Many of them as soon as they were done with whatever schooling they were involved in. The minute you stop delving into the new and novel, is the moment you start to die. So many people are caught up in their past. They still look at the world the same way they did in college or high school, and still listen to the same music, and even watch the same movies. Nothing against nostalgia, but if that is all your life is, you are on your way out. No matter how old you live to be. The people who keep going are the ones who don’t stopping learning and creating things. They have something to drive them forwards. They want more out of life, and age doesn’t present that much of an obstacle to them.

Grow up. A coupling of words people throw around easily. I think, however, the best definition of this, is that of responsibility. Not the responsibility of a house or kids or anything like that, but simply the responsibility for ones actions. A grown up is someone that is responsible for what they say and do. Most people never grow up, and in this respect, that is part of the problem with the world. Most people won’t accept blame when they screw up. It’s an insecurity that does no one any good. I find that no matter how angry I may be about something, if the person who is responsible just owns up to it, it tends to dissipate that anger… unless of course it’s something they do again and again, in which case it doesn’t mean much. It’s hard to be angry with someone who comes right out and admits they screwed up or made a mistake and apologizes for it. Being ‘Grown Up’ is not about what clothes your wear or what you do with your life. Being ‘Grown Up’ is taking responsibility for your life, and what you do with it. Really, that is all it is.

Unfortunately, we seem to live in a land of old children…

Lost as Ritual

Most people see only the small picture. Even when they think that is not the case, because really, most people won’t say that they only see the small picture, because it doesn’t sound complimentary. However, it is an accurate way of describing life, day to day. It is how human beings develop normally. Our day to day existence preoccupies us, and most people don’t look beyond it.

In order to truly be able to see any kind of BIG picture, you need a lead, someone to bring you along and initiate you. The reason being, is that with rare exception, you can’t find the big picture alone. It’s invisible. You can’t see the forest for the trees, oftentimes because you need help to get that full view. Initiation and Ritual are means to show that big picture. Now, today, mostly, these things are trivial. They lead to nothing more than people feeling special because they are part of a group. Often it’s used as an ego boost, to make individuals feel like because they belong to said group, they are better than others who do not belong. This is the draw of the secret society, or the religious group. The rituals are banal, and there is not concept of a big picture.

Lost. The TV Show, however, works as an analogy to this. The show starts small and ends big. At the start, there is no real hint of where the story will be a couple seasons down the road. You’re only seeing the trees. As the story evolves you learn new perspectives and new ideas, and eventually you realize that where you started was just a small tree. It is so rare to see something like this on a popular television show. Such media has always been relegated to short attention spans, but over the last decade or so, more shows have worked on this idea, but none with the ritualistic perfection of Lost. What so many people do not understand, is that you can’t skip to the end. Just like you can’t pick random episodes of Lost and understand them, true initiation, true ritual, prepares you to understand bigger concepts. Concepts that you can’t just skip to the point and understand, concepts that require those steps, because they ARE the initiation. Thus Lost becomes a symbol of what has been lost in our world. The big picture. Shamans and wise men who can really initiate someone into the bigger picture, are few and far in between any more. Wisdom isn’t dispensed like belts in Karate. Wisdom is absorbed and becomes a part of who you are. There are no awards or grades or certificates of Wisdom. There are no titles. In the end, seeing the big picture, comes only to the wise, who can not directly impart this to the people still lost in the trees. The gap is too big, and the road not seemingly relevant to day to day life. It is not something that can be labeled.

So to most, Lost is the closest they will come to understanding how that works. They may not realize it, but it’s there. Lost doesn’t just tell a story, it initiates you, it works in a ritualistic fashion to reveal the many secrets the story possesses. Secrets that would make no sense from watching just the first few episodes. And just like a true teacher, it brings up more questions than it answers. Of course, in our world, obsessed with gratification as it is, that can aggravate people. Questions are the key, being able to ask questions is key. Earning the answers makes them mean something.

Earth Day Thoughts

Earth Day Thoughts

Perhaps the biggest thing that people seem to miss when it comes to environmentalism, is what the real problem is. Quite simply, there are WAY to many of us. Everyone is so concerned about 'going green' and protecting the planet, but the truth is, it's too late to stop things. The tipping point was reached quite some time ago, and as we always do, we missed the big picture then, just as we are now. I don't think that anyone can honestly say that our filthy, polluting ways are good, but the biggest problem is how many of us there are polluting. We are over polluting because we are overpopulated. If we all died tomorrow, the planet would recover. In the end, no matter what we do, the planet will recover. So let's be more specific. The planet does not need us to save it, we need to save ourselves... from ourselves. And maybe, from the planet. There is currently not enough food and water to sustain the population that exists on this planet. With an exponentially increasing population, that fact is going to become more and more clear. This is not something that our reliance on technology can save us from. In the next few decades, this will be all too clear, and the next wars will not be over oil, but water and food.

Humans are still in the mindset that we have to reproduce as much as possible. This was true 6000+ years ago when the end of the ice age wiped out most of the human population. But in the last 100 years, we have gone way to far. And it's not that hard to fix in short periods of time. Consider, if every two people have one child. And of those children, every two have one child, ect., by the time we all start dying off, the population level will start to drop. We can't reverse global warming, but we can affect how many people are here at once. The problem is that so many people have multiple kids, because they want to, because they think they are supposed to, because they are too stupid to use birth control, because they love children, because they want a big family, and so on. But does anyone want a big family that will starve in a couple decades? Global warming is reducing our food and water supplies, and we keep making more and more people who are going to need said supplies. I get seriously upset when I see people with multiple kids, and people mistake that for me not liking kids, but that is not it at all. It is simple math. Too many people, too few resources, not enough space. I don't want future generations to pay for our selfishness. Unfortunately, they will. Because we will continue to act just the way we do, with people having 6 and 8 kids, because they want to, or are too stupid to figure out how not to. And within 10-20 years, overpopulation will be the big issue, just like environmentalism is today, and once again, it will be far too late to do anything about it, because we never learn to see the big picture.

Appreciation

Why the lack of appreciation. We have a fascinating world that we have created for ourselves, and most of us seem to only look to the horizon or beyond, and never look around at the wonder they have around them. Progress is always good, but to forsake the present for a phantom future is silly, just as silly to close future progress in the present. But a balance is not hard, not really. Appreciate what you have and move forward. Life should be lived, that is why we are here, after all. Christians live for Heaven, Buddhists for the non-existence of Nirvana, and on and on it goes. All looking for a reward later. Sad to waste what you have for something that does not exist. Religious or otherwise. To move forwards with blinders on will cause you to miss all the wonderful things that abound around you. Focused on just one idea, one goal, rather than the experience of what comes. As a society, we are failing, our leaders and others, conspire to limit our choices and freedom, to control all they can, and we, blindly, follow their path. Change starts within, we need to break the shackles inside that have created this reality, and make something better. Appreciate what you have. Live you life. Not so hard, really...

Dhamra

We are surrounded by rules and laws. Taught what is right and wrong. And yet, these things can never be absolute. No law covers all situations, no rule allows for all things that could be happening. Yet, the simple truth is, that inside we all know what is right. And by right, I do not refer to a simple black and white separation of things, because all things are relative. There is an old Sanskrit word, Dharma. There are volumes of ancient literature written about this in India. And in the simplest form it means 'Right Action'. That is an individual perspective in all cases, and something that does not always follow logic. We all have access to this sense, yet most people are taught to ignore it. Perhaps because it can not be controlled by written laws and rules, and that is what those in power want to use to keep their power. It doesn't matter in the slightest, however, what they want, you can always open yourself up to it.

In any situation, you have that sense of what is the right thing to do. Sometimes it may logically seem like the wrong thing, however, it is the thing that takes you where you need to be. Crowley coined a phrase; Do As Thou Wilt Shall Be the Whole of the Law. Simpletons made this to be you can do whatever you want. Wiccans corrupted it to be; Do as you Will, but Harm None. But that is not what it means in either case. It means to follow Dharma, in this case identified as Your Will. Crowley also said that Every Man and Woman is a Star, in this case meaning that everyone has their own Will to follow, and that we all follow our own orbits and paths.

Staying true to this path is what one needs to be truly satisfied in this existence. It does not mean you will be happy all the time, it is not some magic formula that unlocks paradise, life is about contrast, and experience, of all kinds. You can get knocked down, and you can keep getting up, ideally, one more time that you can get knocked down, and although it may be hell during the time you experience it, you learn much about yourself in the aftermath, you can even feel good about it after the fact. We exist here, inside time, but outside of this world, we also exist, and there, we are outside of the confines of time. That part of us knows what it wants and where it wants to explore, and it can see from a much wider perspective. But that part of us, is not conscious here. However, we can get a sense of which way we should go from it, from that part of us that can see so much more, that can see to a further horizon. Dharma. And, what it truly becomes, more than any dogma or organization can create, is faith. It is true faith, because you know, in a sense that can not be spoken, in a sense that can not be taught, where to step.

Even sensing it does not mean that we will not cave into our egos now and again and do what we know we should not, that is also a part of life. Our lower selves conflicting with our higher selves. I think that a big part of the problem our society now faces is that lack of connection to a higher self. Without that, we will fall to ruin. Written laws can not help us. Obeying material, lower senses does not help us, it does not take us where we should go, and it does not allow us to grow. We all need to be able to trust in ourselves with a faith that can't be shaken. All of us. No matter how much you feel that that description fits you, you can always be more connected than you are. The conflict between above and below is meant to be, it is healthy, it is where we find out strength and our weaknesses. It is where we learn more about this being that we have spent our lives creating. Are you proud of your creation? You should be. But it can always be made better. There can always be more. There are always new heights, new challenges, new mysteries... There is always something more to create.

See, it is simple. It is honesty with yourself, honesty with others follows that naturally. It is the faith to close your eyes and jump, because you know you should, rather than giving into the fear of not knowing what is there that you are jumping into... Rather than having to look to a church or organization to see what they recommend. It is freedom personified. We make our world what we make it. I don't think it would be hard to make it more interesting than it is now, do you?

Love Under Will. The separation of opposites below the abyss, the contrast that brings the world into being.

Seriah Azkath
Demonic Host Lurking in the Shadows...


"I need to be alone tonight
Smother me or suffer
Lay down I'll die tonight
Smother me or suffer
When I'm gone, wait here
Discover all of life's surprises
When I'm gone wait here
I'll send my child my last good smile

If you pass through my soul tonight
Gather all his troubles
Tomorrow's long eternal night
Gather for tomorrow
When I'm gone wait here
Discovers all of earth's surprises
When I'm gone wait here
I'll send my child my last good smile"

- Fields of the Nephilim "Love Under Will"

Book Review: Alien Energy: UFO's, Ritual Landscapes, and the Human Mind by Andrew Collins

Alien Energy: UFO's, Ritual Landscapes, and the Human Mind by Andrew Collins

This is actually an early book from Andrew Collins, re-released a few years ago. Overall, WELL worth the read. We'll start with the negatives, though. The typeset in the book is horrible. The font is tiny, and there is a lot of extra space. The photos, which play such a part in the research also look pretty bad. Finally, being that so much of it is recounting details of research, you can find yourself getting a bit tired of drudging through some of the text.

As for positives, however, the material is fantastic. He starts off talking about William Reich's Orgone Energy Theory, and the various experiments conducted. This ties in to some of their experiments later on. He follows that we fascinating research on Crop Circles. At this point, most Crop Circles are fakes, but there are some that are not known to be fake, and he goes back on the history of the subject, all the way back to the middle ages. The thing that he finds most interesting is the unusual effects that are experiences inside the crop circles, whether that be increased radiation traces, or physical symptoms that even the most skeptical people can suffer.

He poses a theory. That there is something in the field of energy of the earth, which in certain locations, can be a sort of window area, where other dimensions can overlap. He suggests that certain areas where crop circles are made are prone to this type of bleed through, and that somehow the crop circle amplifies it.

Beyond that, he then reviews Paul Devereux's Earth Lights research, which shows a correlation between fault lines and paranormal or UFO encounters. When he overlays this data with Crop Circles, he sees more possible correlations. And finally, he explores the nature of the earth below various ancient sites, to see of there is something they share, that may, again, enhance this energy.

After working through these various pieces, they then conduct 2 experiments based on these theories, using a lot of sensitive instruments, Geiger counters, IR Photography, and various other tools. They combine that with various locations, and ancient sights, orgone accumulators, and a host of meditations. This is the part of the book that drags the most. And it doesn't help that there is nothing that definitively proves or disproves anything. Collins is a good researcher, he doesn't jump at any anomaly and claim it proof. He looks for patterns, and they do find some intriguing ones to be present. There are also some really interesting personal experiences that he relates from the experiments.

I believe, not just based on his research, but also on my personal experiences, that he may be on to something. This has brought light unto some very strange things that have happened to me over the years, as Collins seems to do with many of his books. His work suggests that what we see as UFO's and mysterious lights in the sky, may not only be real, but far stranger than most people imagine. As with John Keel, his work leans towards an Ultra-Terrestrial explanation for these things. Collins admits to being an ardent believer in the nuts and bolts UFO theory for many years, but now has seen enough to suspect that our conscious minds play as much a part in their manifestation as the beings themselves.

If you want an open minded and original piece of work, this is it. But, as I said, it is a bit of a chore to work your way through. If you are serious about exploring these connections, though, read this.

Kundalini

Kundalini is a tricky subject. There are two main forms of it, and it can be very easily mistaken for something else. Basically, Kundalini is an energy force that exists in everyone. In Eastern traditions it is seen as a Serpent, coiling, sleeping, at the base of the spine, just inside the tailbone. Some have called it the supreme force of Magic in man, others an spiritual evolutionary force. However you look at it, it is a powerful force when awakened. And that is when the two main forms come in. One is voluntary awakening. This is done most commonly through Kundalini Yoga, and is, if done right, slow and gradual, and mostly positive. Emphasis, on ‘if done right’. Kundalini can be a very unpleasant, and potentially deadly force if not controlled correctly. Thus, Kundalini Yoga should never be entered into lightly.

The other main form that Kundalini manifests as, is an involuntary awakening. No one knows why, but in some people, it just wakes up and wreaks havoc on them, mainly due to the imbalanced nature in which it awakens, and the lack of understanding in what is occuring. There are some known triggers. Certain types of injury, especially to the lower back have been known to awaken it. Also, Kenneth Ring in studying Near Death Experiencers and UFO Experiencers, found that one of the common aftereffects of both experiences was Kundalini Awakening. And there are some people, in which it awakens without any specific cause, it just wakes up, and it can make you think you’re going crazy.

The symptoms of it’s awakening are diverse and many. The following are some of the more common symptoms...

* Muscle twitches, cramps or spasms.

* Energy rushes or immense electricity circulating the body.

* Electro-Sensitivity. Sensitivity to electro-magnetic fields, or the ability to intentionally or unintentionally affect electrical devices (making computers crash just by touching them, for example).

* Itching, vibrating, prickling, tingling, stinging or crawling sensations.

* Intense heat or cold. These can alternate or be either. In example, you may find yourself very hot when it is cold out, to the point of giving off massive amounts of heat, or freezing, even in extremely hot environments.

* Involuntary bodily movements (occur more often during meditation, rest or sleep): jerking, tremors, shaking; feeling an inner force pushing one into postures or moving one's body in unusual ways. (May be misdiagnosed as epilepsy, restless legs syndrome (RLS), or PLMD.)

* Alterations in eating and sleeping patterns.

* Episodes of extreme hyperactivity or, conversely, overwhelming fatigue (some Chronic Fatigue Syndrome victims are experiencing Kundalini awakening).

* Intensified or diminished sexual desires. Kundalini is strongly associated with sexual force.

* Headaches, pressures within the skull. Cracked feeling in the head, as if your skull is shattering into pieces. The pressure sensation can be very intense.

* Racing heartbeat, pains in the chest.

* Digestive system problems.

* Numbness or pain in the limbs (particularly the left foot and leg).

* Pains and blockages anywhere; often in the back and neck (Many cases of FMS are Kundalini-related.)

* Emotional outbursts; rapid mood shifts; seemingly unprovoked or excessive episodes of grief, fear, rage, or depression.

* Spontaneous vocalizations (including laughing and weeping) -- are as unintentional and uncontrollable as hiccoughs.

* Hearing an inner sound or sounds, classically described as a flute, drum, waterfall, birds singing, bees buzzing but which may also sound like roaring, whooshing, or thunderous noises or like ringing in the ears.

* Mental confusion; difficulty concentrating.

* Altered states of consciousness: heightened awareness; spontaneous trance states; mystical experiences (if the individual's prior belief system is too threatened by these, they can lead to bouts of psychosis or self-grandiosity).

* Heat, strange activity, and/or blissful sensations in the head, particularly in the crown area.

* Ecstasy, bliss and intervals of tremendous joy, love, peace and compassion.

* Psychic experiences: extrasensory perception; out-of-body experiences; past life memories; astral travel; direct awareness of auras and chakras; contact with spirit guides through inner voices, dreams or visions; healing powers...

* Increased creativity: new interests in self-expression and spiritual communication through music, art, poetry, etc.

* Intensified understanding and sensitivity: insight into one's own essence; deeper understanding of spiritual truths; exquisite awareness of one's environment (including "vibes" from others)

* Enlightenment experiences: direct Knowing of a more expansive reality; transcendent awareness.

* Poltergeist activity, or other strange, paranormal-like activities.

As you can see, the list is long, complicated, and open to interpretation. Oftentimes Kundalini is misdiagnosed by ‘modern’ doctors as Epilepsy (as it may cause some similar brain patterns), Psychosis, or much worse. Sometimes, a victim of unintentional Kundalini awakening can become extremely frustrated by the lack of help for their symptoms that the medical profession can provide. There are good and bad sides to the whole awakening process...

It may be useful at this point to explain a little about how this energy affects us. For some of us, this takes an adjustment of how we look at things. In order for this to make sense, the concept that the body creates consciousness must be released. This is partially why the medical profession does not acknowledge Kundalini, Chakras, or anything of the like, despite the fact that it can be measured and tested. Kundalini only makes sense if you look at it the other way around, as the body created by consciousness (not that much of a stretch for anyone that realizes how consciousness interacts at a quantum level, now is it?). As Kundalini awakens and rises up the spine, it encounters ‘blocks’ in the body, usually located around the various chakras. These ‘blocks’ are really manifestations of mental blocks. As Kundalini ‘burns’ through them, it often causes a great deal of pain. The most common description, and the most painful, is the feeling like someone is stabbing you with a red hot knife, and slowly twisting it. It can create other sensations as well, but that is one that I’ve personally heard quite a few times and experienced myself. This burning, attempts to bring up whatever the block is made of and can cause a release of both thoughts and emotions that are associated. When you know what you are dealing with, you can work with it and try and ease the process as much as possible. When you don’t know what’s happening, well, you naturally tend to fight it, and that just makes matters worse. This situation is often just exasperated when you go to a Doctor and they tell you there is nothing wrong with you or that they can’t figure out what’s wrong. Not what you want to hear when in intense pain. But an understanding of what is happening only comes through time and open-mindedness.

I said in the beginning of this, that Kundalini can be deadly, and this is rare, but true. There are some cases of Kundalini where when the energy is not freed to rise and fall along the spine the illnesses that it can cause can be life threatening. A good book to pick up on this overall is John White’s “Kundalini, Evolution, and Enlightenment”. It is a compilation of stories and articles on the subject and reveals a lot of different sides to The Serpent. The other danger is in Spontaneous Human Combustion. It is entirely possible that the cause of this mysterious phenomenon may be an overload of Kundalini. To date, there has been no satisfactory explanation of what causes SHC, and this is a very likely candidate, especially since it can physically raise body temperature drastically and suddenly.

As I said, there are good and bad sides... The bad sides are pretty obvious, but the positive is more than worth it. It can bring you to a sense of self-awareness and enlightenment beyond words. It can bring a sense of peace and calm and ‘oneness’ that is ineffable. It can strengthen you, both mind and body, and completely revitalize your world view. The negative is worth the positive, but it’s getting there that is a major battle.

Obviously, if you don’t know what’s happening to you, there is little you can do about it aside from suffer. That’s one of the reasons that I wanted to create this page. I have met enough people who have at very least some Kundalini energy problems, and in some cases major problems, to know that it’s probably a much wider phenomenon than anyone is really expecting. Below are some links to other on-line resources that may be of help. Working through it is a matter of patience, meditation, self-exploration, self-awareness, and control. Everyone is different and there is not really a set method for dealing with it. I am very interested in hearing from other people who have had this experience, and anyone that has any questions or is looking for help is welcome to contact me as well. I will do what I can to answer based on my knowledge and experience.

Seriah Azkath
February 20, 2002

The Journey...

The journey is what matters. All the answers leave you empty. It doesn’t matter if it is as trivial as a TV show, like Lost, or as deep as a spiritual journey. To have all the answers means that the journey is over. There isn’t anything more. The story has been told. The journey is the wondrous part of the whole thing. I realize that people want all the answers just handed to them, right now. Why is that? Why do so many people not know how to live? People go to school and memorize all the answers, and once they have them, they walk out into what they think is life, only to dully exist day to day. There is no journey. There may be the acquiring of money. There may be the goal of retirement, but it is all a safe, well-traveled road. And at that point, why bother? The dynamic vividness of life is smothered. If you know all the island’s secrets, why bother watching the drama of finding them unfold? There is no excitement in that. Life is not safe, and we should embrace that. We should embrace its dark hidden areas, because that is where the wonder lies, untouched. New. To walk in circles is lunacy. To stay on the most well worn areas of the path, is tedium. To not explore the wonder, is blasphemy. The journey always ends, so why not see as much as you can, while you can? Why not tread right where you fear to? Sometimes you need to, to live. To remind yourself that you are alive, because even walking down the middle of the path is only an illusion of safety. Fear is the killer and the thief, stealing your life away. Find your own way, and you find yourself. And you truly live your life.

“When living your life like an arrow in flight, you must always accept that the end is in sight. Be grateful at least, for the fact that you knew that you came to death – He did not come for you. You are like targets who sit and await, patiently suffer the arrows of fate, saying ‘I am but mortal and destined to die, I can change nothing, so why should I try?’”

- Sabbat “The Best of Enemies”